Chandler: Well, hello!
Joey: Where've you been?
Chandler: The doctor.
Ross: Is everything okay?
Chandler: Oh, yes. Just had me a little nubbin-ectomy. Yep. Two nipples, no waiting.
Monica: Wow. Just like Rachel in high school.
Monica: Come on, I was kidding. It was such an obvious joke.
Chandler: That was an obvious joke. And I didn't think of it. Why didn't I think of it? [Points at his chest] The source of all my powers. Oh, dear, what have I done?
Mine is not any untoward body parts; rather, it was the catastrophe that was my online dating. Now that I've had an online dating-ectomy, I seem to be sadly lacking in blog content.
For no other reason than to change this, I decided to sign up for another online dating service. The problem is, I don't want to pay for it; I'd much rather spend my money on chocolates in Germany than making fake connections with 40-year-old men. (First contact. He also can't live without his smartphone. I totally judged him.)
Anyway, without paying for it, it's basically pointless. Since I really don't care, it's even more pointless. I lasted a whopping four days before pulling the plug.
And what was the website's inspiring speech to get me to stay? Check it out for yourself.
On the down side, this pretty much guarantees that I will have no conversations to mock. On the up side, it might help to restore a little faith in single men, since based on my recent interactions conversations they are only interested in sex and their own delusions of awesomeness.