Last week I talked my running group into doing a half marathon today. The guy who heads the group sponsors this race, which is coming up next month, and I am doing it. I wanted to see what I needed to work on and get familiar with the course.
One funny thing about running is that with all of the blood rushing to your legs, your brain gets a little, well, loopy. Weird things stick out, especially when my phone is on shuffle for all songs, ranging from instrumental hymns and the Mormon Tabernacle Choir to Nirvana, the Eagles and Black Sabbath. Things like specific song lyrics begin to take a deeper meaning as my body cursed me through the pain.
Well, OK, deeper in some cases is a bet of a stretch.
"I wish I could eat your cancer when it turns black." Nirvana, 3 miles. Gross. Why would he sing that?
"God must have spent a little more time on you (sung all crooning like)" *NSync, about 4 miles. Ugh. Why did I load this song onto my phone?
"I'll go where you want me to go." Mormon Tabernacle Choir, 6 miles. I very much wanted to go home.
"Oh, this is gotta be the good life." One Republic, about halfway. I know more hills are coming. This is not the good life.
"I hope ... " Dixie Chicks, 8 miles in. I'm hoping too, sister -- hoping I'll remember why on earth I wanted to do this.
"Hey now, you're an all-star!" Smashmouth, 9.5 miles in, as I realized I'd missed a turn and gone an extra quarter of a mile -- uphill.
"We've come so much farther than we thought we could." Nashville Tribute Band, halfway up a hill about 10.5 miles in. I was panting and would have cried, but every single iota of energy in my body was going toward putting one foot in front of the other.
"Onward, ever onward, as we glory in his name!" Mormon Tabernacle Choir, 11 miles in and just dead tired, even going downhilll.
"Gonna get ... dirty!" Christina Aguilera, 12 miles. I stink.
"What doesn't kill you makes you stronger!" Kelly Clarkson, halfway home, right about the time the nausea was wearing off and runner's high was setting in.
New plan: For the actual race, soundtrack will be loaded with songs like "Ironman," "Life in the Fast Lane"and "Greased Lightning."