Seriously, it could be true, based on these facts:
1) I don't think it's inappropriate for the government to ban teens from using cell phones while driving.
2) I don't think it's wrong to ask people to not smoke in the car when children are in the car with them.
3) I think people should step up and take care of their friends/relatives/neighbors/countrymen.
4) If people won't because of laziness/apathy/selfishness, I have no problem with the government filling in.
5) I really don't see a problem with sex education, and by that I mean discussing condoms and birth control along with pregnancy and STDs, in public schools.
6) I do not like having the Constitution selectively applied to meet the needs/wants/desires of the people in power.
7) I see the validity in paying taxes.
8) I would be totally fine if Big Brother stepped into our lives and banned video and computer games for everyone, regardless of age, because of how stupid, pointless, potentially harmful and a huge waste of time they are.
As I look at this list, I noticed a theme. If we take out 6 and 7, the rest can be resolved fairly easily. The solution wouldn't cost money, it wouldn't require legislation or Congress or a political party. Sound good? Want to know what the magic bean is?
OF COURSE brand-new drivers should not be distracted by cell phones when they're driving, and they should realize how valuable their lives and the lives of every other person on the road are and want to not do anything to endanger said lives.
OF COURSE parents, aunts, uncles, older siblings and baby-sitters shouldn't smoke when children are in the car. Why would you want to subject your child to the toxins you inflict on yourself every day? Do you want your child to get lung cancer or emphysema? Do you want your 3rd-grader to be breathing like a dying chow after a 40-yard run in PE? Do you want your middle-schooler to spend 1 out of every 4 days home sick because his health is so bad because of your filthy, disgusting habit? Put that cigarette out. If you can't drive across town without lighting up, you need help.
And OF COURSE we should take care of each other. The Bible says so, the Koran says so, the Torah says so, Oprah says so, Mother Theresa, the pope and President Monson say so, George Washington would say so if he were here. What, like no one's every done anything nice for you?
OF COURSE we need to talk about sex ed. Guess what, educators of Utah — kids have sex. Not all of them, and not all the time, but talk about it in class or not, some of those kids will be having sex. Teaching them about safe sex is not an invitation to have sex. Being a teenager is an invitation to have sex. Ideally, children wouldn't be learning all about sex in school. But they have three basic options: 1) at home from their parents (best-case scenario), 2) their schools, or 3) their friends and the TV (most likely scenario, while at the same time absolutely the worst possible way. Do you really want your 15-year-old that sex is as carefree as Monica and Chandler make it seem?) Teach them the biology of sex. Explain its significance. Explain the consequences. Explain what they can do to protect themselves. Make it OK for them to talk to somebody who's not a teenager about sex. Stop treating it like a bad word already.
And finally, I so wish a legislator would put forward a bill to ban these silly video games that I am not even going to dignify by naming. (That and because I don't know all of them, but yup, I think that one's a waste of time too). Should adults be able to spend every waking moment playing these games? Sure. But my charity shouldn't extend to that -- no health care, no housing help, no food stamps. Should children be able to waste their lives on it? Come on, people, there are hundreds of laws on the books to protect children because they are not capable of protecting themselves. Yes, these laws are OK.
Maybe this specific law wouldn't be the best idea. But any legislator who puts it forward has my vote.